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Child Custody - Divorce Tips for ParentsChild Custody - Divorce Tips for Parents

Divorce Do’s and Don’ts for Parents– Part One

Divorce is never a pleasant experience. Even when both parties know it is the right decision for all concerned, divorce is hard. It represents broken dreams and bittersweet memories. This is especially true when children are involved.

Ralls Law Firm has some valuable tips for divorcing parents.


  • Talk directly with your spouse about child-related issues. Refrain from using the children as messengers. Putting them in the middle only adds to the stress they are experiencing as their parents divorce.
  • Limit your conversations with your spouse to matters relating to the children after you discuss those matters with your lawyer and you understand concepts of legal custody, parenting time, etc. You need a baseline of knowledge to orchestrate a working parenting plan.
  • Let your lawyer handle the marital issues with the other party’s lawyer. There is nothing to be gained by the two parties arguing about old marital issues – those are now irrelevant as you deal with your children. Remember—courts generally do not care or need to know what went wrong in the marriage. Focus on the children and what is best for them.
  • In talking with your children about the divorce, keep your comments about the other parent either positive or neutral. Remember that your children are not divorcing their other parent. You are the one getting the divorce.
  • Remember that you and your departing spouse will need to co-parent in a civilized manner until the children are adults. And even after they reach adulthood, there will be weddings at which you will both be present, and grandchildren that you will share, like it or not. For your children’s sake, it is important that the two of you deal civilly with each other.
  • Besides easing your children through a divorce proceeding, focus on gathering information on the assets, debts, and values of the marital estate. Who gets what may be dramatically affect one’s standard of living going forward.
  • Seek counseling if your emotions are getting the better of you. A good therapist can guide you through some of the overwhelming feelings that often accompany divorce.

In Part Two we will cover some helpful “Don’ts” for divorcing parents.

Richard Ralls of Ralls Law Firm can assist you in determining whether you can enforce grandparent rights. Call us at 913 236 7260 or 816 421 4222. Licensed in Kansas and Missouri.